Confessions of an Unrequited Lover
He wasn’t the one because he never understood me. He never understood my sarcasm. He never understood that while my words are honest and straightforward, they aren’t the end all or be all of what I am saying. He never understood that he had to look deeper to understand that behind every word is just a young woman with good heart trying to find another soul that gets her. He never understood that to truly get me, is to first admit that I am a hard person to understand.
He wasn’t the one because I never found him funny. His jokes fell flat and his storytelling was atrocious. There was never a guarantee that he would lighten the mood. The twinging of his lips, the raising of his eyebrows was never enough to send my head back, hands being clapped, mouth open but no sound coming out because everyone knows that’s how I laugh when I find something truly funny. I doubt he found me particularly funny either.
He wasn’t the one because I always had to be smiling. Not every grin is a smile and that is not the only way I convey happiness. When my smile has subsided and my voice goes too soft, i’m not hurt nor am I sad. It just means i’m relaxed enough to exist and not be concerned about keeping up appearances. It means I think the interview has stopped and that silence can be comfortable.
He wasn’t the one because his lips didn’t make my world spin. His lips were forgettable. His lips were too small, too dry and left no impression. His kisses just left me thinking about the last lips that I bit and pulled. He had too much passion and I had too little. His lips just weren’t right.
He wasn’t the one because I could never sleep like a baby next to him. He never had the ability to calm my spirit, settle my mind and make me so relaxed that I could drift off into dreamland as easy as 1-2-3. Falling asleep next to him..or even better on his chest was not a desire that I had and the thought of waking up in his arms didn’t make my heart smile.
He wasn’t the one because simply my dear…he wasn’t you.